Playing Doctor

 
I don't go to the doctor.  

It's not that I'm in some weird religious cult with "science" in it's name.  I just haven't had much experience with doctors' advise turning out to be of any value to me.  I read occasional health-related articles and consult the pages of "Prescriptions for Nutritional Healing," and do okay.  Every time I've thought that maybe a visit to the doctor might be called for, I've ended up regretting it.  

When I accidentally sliced my thumb open and rushed to the ER, I waited and waited--along with all the other stupid dinner-time kitchen utensil accident victims--missing my blood-tinged meal, and finally getting a few stitches, only to have the stitches ultimately fall out before the wound was completely healed.  Now when I feel the scar on the tip of my thumb, I can't help but think that I could have saved a pretty penny by using a roll of duct tape to do it myself with better results.  And with the money saved, I could have bought a better can opener.

Looking back, I'd have to say that the best medical advice I have ever received has come from non-doctors (friends, family members, and complete strangers).  Because of this, when a medical question popped into my head today, my first thought was not to call the doctor, or even to consult a medical website... 

My first thought was to post my medical inquiry on facebook.  

What better use of a status update than to elicit medical diagnosis from 349 of my "closest friends"?  And since a lot of my friends are actors, I'm sure there would be plenty who would relish the opportunity to play the part of the doctor with great authority.

That led to another idea.  I thought it would be fun to ask my friends to participate in a social networking experiment.  If everyone who was willing to post a medical question as their status line would also take a screen-shot of the crazy replies they received and send the screen-shots to me, I could compile them in an album--a virtual coffee table book entitled "Playing Doctor: diagnoses in the age of facebook".

You think I'm kidding, don't you?

Nope.  Serious is my middle name.  If you're in, send me your screen-shots (preferably zoomed in so we can read the comments).